I’ll call my sister
Allison, her sister Lauren, and I, went to Michael’s, to get some supplies for Thanksgiving arts & crafts. Lauren went into the store while Allison and I went to Target to get a pan for the turkey. When Allison and I were checking out, I asked her whether we’d eat …
Read More
Chipotle concern
The Chipotle dude was a little puzzled when I ordered this. I think he considered calling the police.
Read More
500 rubles
We exit the hotel in Moscow and there’s a cab parked in front of the hotel. Wife: “Kremlin” The driver stares at her blankly. Husband (in mean, Russian accent): “Kremlin” Driver: “800 rubles” Wife: “What? No way.” Driver: “Minimum from hotel is 1000 rubles.” Wife: “We’ll walk” (we start walking …
Read More
Toasted plantain
Today my wife set on fire a plantain she was microwaving at her office, which is in the 9th story of a building, which luckily is still standing. I think I will either barricade our kitchen or install a sprinkler system that goes off when the wife threatens to cook.
Read More
Chapstick trick
For a few days, Allison kept using the last remains of her chapstick. She got to the point when most of what she was getting on her lips was plastic case rather than lip balm. A few days into this, she finally realized that the chapstick was not almost gone. …
Read More
Omega-3’d Floor
What’s that on the floor? Termites? Ant poop? No. Flax seed from the wife making smoothies. (Rosie, at the top of the picture, can attest to it)
Read More
Good morning, strangers!
We arrived last night at Allison’s parents’ place for the holidays. This morning, upon waking up, Allison took our dog Rosie for a walk. When they came back, Allison vaguely noticed that the small SUV outside the house was black, and she thought that her parents’ car was silver. But …
Read More
Front desk saves stinky wife
The wife forgot her deodorant at home while traveling, but was saved by the hotel’s front desk.
Read More
Quiet banging
We woke up today, the day after Thanksgiving, in a hotel in East Texas, where we’ve been vacationing the last two days. I told Allison I’d meditate for the next 20 minutes, and she said she would take our dog Rosie out to pee and poop. So Allison and Rosie …
Read More
